Blue Label Questions Side B

Greetings, true believers (please don’t sue Mr. Lee)!  Someone once said, all you need is a handful of good friends to get you through life.  I agree with this fervently because entourages are for celebrities and mafia bosses.  A man I greatly respect writes his own blog to try and input some of his adventures and advice into this world.  Not to embellish but it is a smashing success and he has a large fan base.  Some time ago, he implemented a running series for his blog entitled, “Blue Label Questions”.  This consists of an interview of close friends and family over a glass of Johnny Walker Blue Label Scotch and to open up about life experiences, friendly advice, and ultimately a portrayal of what makes the particular interviewee tick. 

Over the course of Labor Day weekend, I had the privilege to interview the creator of Blue Label Questions to find out what makes him tick and what kind of person he is.  I have known this man most of my life. 

Clearly we refuse to grow up

He has always striven to do the right thing and he has dedicated his life to teaching.  Without further ado, here is the interview I conducted with my best friend and one of the best men I have ever had the privilege of knowing.  I give you the man we call El (as in The), the myth, the legend, Sergio Espain. 

 

 

Lil blue label. Cheers. Ahh.  Let us get started

Tell us, where did you grow up?

I was born in Modesto, CA.  We lived in Turlock until I was 9.  Had some good memories there but did not make very many lasting friends and then we moved to Bakersfield. I have a rule if you spend the majority of your life in a town then it becomes your hometown.  Bakersfield became my hometown.  I grew up here.  I went to Laurelglenn Elementary. I went to Tevis junior high and it was two very forgettable years. Went to Stockdale high in the fall of 2001, met Tyler, and became best friends.  I honestly believe I didn’t grow up till I got out of high school. 

Snicker from me. I think that was 90% of our graduating class. If that.

Right, haha.  Once you get out of that safe warm blanket of adolescence and then you’re faced with the real world, which was a wakeup call. Having to get a real job. Go, oh man I have bills to pay. I grew up here and it’s hard because I used to have dreams of leaving Bakersfield but the more I stay here the more reasons I find to stay here. Part of me doesn’t think I’m going to leave while there’s another part of me yearning to leave.

How do you handle the dichotomy of those two sides?  How do you feel about both of them and does one tug at you more?

Yeah, I want to stay because this is my community. I am a product of Bakersfield; negatively and positively. I want to stay because I know if I stay I will make a difference.  But I know that in order to truly test my mettle I will have to leave the city limits. To truly test myself and implement my theories I would need to leave…comfort.   I’m more of a take me wherever the wind goes.

Who is your hero and what did he or she teach you?

Cliché answer, my first hero growing up was my dad. He was a hard worker. Hardly took any days off. He instilled a method of madness in me that hard work and drive will get you anywhere and everywhere. He instilled this in me before I could learn any different.  This started with chores, homework, and the idea hard work will pay off. The older I got the more I watched him succeed in his field and became evident he was very well respected in his field.  He is the MAN where he works. That prestige and reputation carried over to the home, where he is the man. He was the end all be all, this is the way it’s going to be.  He showed me the importance of having an opinion and backing it up. He is my hero because in the wake of his own mortality during his sickness he was and is still more of a man than most people I have ever met.  When you realize your father is human and not superman, that is when you start to re-evaluate everything, but that did not happen to me. He was still hard working, do the right thing, and always tells the truth. My dad is my hero.

Nice. Just to touch on something you mentioned, you did mention your father’s illness and not going into detail that was something which took a long time and was a big emotional strain on your family. Did you find yourself becoming more of the head of the household during that time, out of necessity of course, but did you find you fit the role well or did you feel it was too much of a burden. Did you feel like you were measuring up to your father?

My dad first got sick when I was 17. He was at a downtown hospital and I went to visit him after school.  He tried to be calm and cool. He said, while I’m here you’re the man of the house. Take care of things. Do as I would do. When I was 23 he got sick again and it was the same thing. While I’m here, take care of things, you are the man of the house. Then it happened again in 2012. He had very high expectations of me. He always had a list of marching orders. Do this. Pay this guy. Get the car smog checked. I took the place of his authority. Do I feel I lived up to it? I don’t know. When it came to doing the right thing and taking care of the house, I think I probably met them. As far as handling the stress of it, it was very stressful. I went through some dark emotional times. I was the rock of the family but I had no one to lean on myself. Not my dad. No one. The stress was back breaking but I found an outlet in my writing. I found an outlet in poetry, reading, and any fictional escape I could take I would.  I watched a lot of movies. Whatever I could do to say you know what, the terminator doesn’t feel anything. Rambo is a machine and whatever I could do I needed to feel that way. You know what I mean? I needed to not show weakness and I did that. Do I think I lived up to the expectations? I think so. I worked hard. I learned a lot about myself. I learned about growing up and about being a man.

I liked how you mentioned how pop culture gave you ideas on how to get through the moment. Let me ask you a follow up question to the hero question, who is your favorite superhero?

It’s going to be fairly obvious, haha…

Really? I could never tell haha

Superman has always been my favorite superhero because he is infallible. He is un-corruptible. He is strong. He always does the right thing and I feel I have the same sense of morality. Doing right and wrong and Superman always does what is right. He is always truth justice and the American way. He is strength on a spectacular level and I applied that mentality to the way I lived. You punch him, nothing happens. Oh whatever, I’m the man of steel! I always felt a strong connection to that because you hit me, I bleed, but only if I let you see me bleed. This is the same way I dealt with my dad’s sickness. I only cried if I wanted you to see it. That is the way I approached my life from a very young age and how I live now. I believe emotionally I have a lot of strength now. He is my favorite because he is an idol and a role model incarnate. I relate to him a lot.

It’s interesting you mention Superman and all those things you mentioned are true but if you read works like Kingdom Come or New Earth you realize that Superman is this godlike figure but he still cannot be everywhere at once and this weighs on him.  Does it almost feel to you like, just save the ones you can?

I have some special people in my life who have told me many times, Sergio you cannot do everything. You have to pick and choose your battles. Now that I have graduated college I see the toll it has taken to try and fit everyone in and trying to do the right thing every single time in every situation.  It’s hard to say sometimes, I can’t help you today. I understand his struggle but I learned it too late.

What is the proudest moment of your life thus far?

Thus far, this is going to sound strange…

We’re all for that.

…at Chicano commencement for my college graduation I gave a speech to my parents telling them they were my heroes for always putting up with me. That was a proud moment because I got to speak directly to them. As great as graduating was with my class and friends…I skipped out 45 minutes early! I skipped out so we could get to breakfast. I could not wait to get out of there! For the Chicano commencement though, my mom, my dad, my girlfriend, and my uncles got to see me on stage dressed in my royal blue graduation garb with my championship belt and they got to see me thank them. I would not be able to do that at the traditional graduation.

Going off on that, did you at first want to do the Chicano commencement?

I did not want to do it because the application was awkward. On the application I had to answer which flag do you want to wear?  It was almost a question of which culture do you choose? 

Sorry to interrupt but can you clarify what you mean by flag?

Oh sure. When you apply for Chicano commencement you are given a sash and you can choose a flag to be on it. You get to choose between Central, Southern, and North American countries.  My dad wanted me to choose the red, white, and green because that is where my lineage comes from but I wanted to choose the red, white, and blue.  I relate more to the United States of America than to Mexico.  The U.S. is my home, this is where I grew up, and the culture I accepted. If I had chosen the Mexico flag over the U.S. flag I would have felt like a traitor. I did not want to do Chicano commencement because I did not want to have to make that decision.  In the end I chose red, white, and blue and I got a lot of grief for it. Quick story, I was one of the only people wearing those colors at Chicano commencement and a guy behind me in line asked why I wasn’t wearing different colors.  My honest response was, “have you been to Mexico”? No, that is not my home. That is not my culture. I had to be talked into it but I’m glad I did it.

Where do you see yourself in ten years?

Ponders this question for a few seconds…uhm…in ten years I want to be teaching remedial English at the university level. Part time.  I want to be teaching high school English because that is where you can mold the minds to accept a certain method of instruction and theory.  You can tell them commas go here and they remember that. The problem I have noticed doing my classroom observations is the teachers have around 240 students and I’ve been told by someone more wise than me that if you reach just one of them then you have succeeded. A lot of the students I have tutored at the college level don’t have the basic English skills they should have been taught in high school.  I don’t want to teach the same student in high school and then at the university level.  I want to impart a level of instruction that can be passed on.  Does that make sense?

Makes perfect sense, but, it also sounds like you want to catch the kids you missed in high school who did not go to your school or simply were not in your class.

Yep, that is it. You said it better than I did.

That is extremely interesting…

I see myself having something published as well. Whether it is a poem or an essay or a story, just something to my name printed somewhere.

Now we’ve gotten through the vegetables so, let’s get to the dessert and ask some fun questions.

Tell me, what sound or noise do you love?

It’s two fold.  The first is the sound of sizzling meat when I’m cooking. The next sound is an empty glass of scotch being filled.

Cheers to that! *clink glasses

Now that I’m hungry, what sound or noise do you hate?

I don’t like negativity. It does not help anyone. With that being said, I do not like the sound of someone saying no.

What is your favorite cuss word and why?

I’ll give you two. Damn, because you can get away with it.  You can say it just about anywhere and it will be okay.  My other favorite word…fuck. It is so versatile and same as damn. You can use it once and you have proven your point and you can say it in a PG-13 movie…just once.

Use both of those words in a single sentence.

Dammit, stay the fuck out of my way!

Haha! Sounds like something you would say at Lowe’s to a really annoying customer service person.

I know what I’m looking for dammit!

Good one.

If heaven exists what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?

You did your best.

Very wise, solemn, answer from God. Almost the Catholic answer.

Now, if God were a prankster he would ask, why did you bet it all on red?!

Hysterical drunken laughter ensues.

What would your last meal be?

Takes forever to decide as if he is on death row and then says…..

 No, wait!  Pound and a half cut of the best prime rib, cooked just to pink. Green beans. Mashed potatoes.  Appetizer, my mom’s nachos.

Room left for dessert?

Dessert would be a slice of New York cheese cake from New York…with a glass of blue label which would be the last thing I would taste.

Last query, what advice would you give to you ten years ago?

This isn’t the end. You are going to do so much with so little. Always take risks and don’t be afraid to say yes.

That’s advice we would all like to give ourselves and take ourselves.  Anything else you want to mention last minute?

Nope, not unless you want to know where all the bodies are are buried…..?

This interview was discovered several months later. The author’s body has not been found.